Divorce is difficult and after the dust has settled, exes might find it impossible to get along. However, if there is a child involved, it is crucial to have cordial relations with the other parent. Here are some ways family therapy services Pennsylvania can help.
Your child should not be the messenger between you and your ex, regardless of how uncomfortable the situation is. Placing the onus on the child to mediate between parents puts the minor in a stressful position and will only exacerbate family tension. You should not cut off contact with your ex, but it is important to learn how to speak respectfully to one another in a neutral environment. Meeting with a therapist will allow both parents to be heard from an objective party who can also offer advice on communication improvement strategies.
Children often feel like they have to choose sides in some aspects after a divorce. As parents will have different approaches to parenting, the child may find it difficult to manage in separate households with different expectations. Therapy can bring everyone together so that the child doesn’t feel pulled in two directions. When he or she sees the parents are on common ground, it’s apparent that everyone is working as a team instead of fighting against each other.
It is natural for children to favor one parent over another, and this can be intensified after a divorce. Even if neither partner was at fault for the split, the child might see one parent as good and the other as the problem. If you are speaking negatively about your ex, you might think it gives you the upper hand. However, a healthy child of divorce will see both parents as valuable and will respect the different qualities that they both offer.
It might seem odd to go to family therapy when the family unit has split, but it could be in everyone’s best interest. Accept that you’ll always be in your ex’s life and make a plan for a bright future.